Friday, February 25, 2011

Pajama Jeans 4 Lyfe

Behold, the beauty that is Pajama Jeans:



While Andy, his sister, and I were in Oklahoma, we all three stayed in one hotel room because we're cheap bitches like that. Andy and I were going to sleep, and Emily was laying in the other bed, watching TV. When the show she was watching went to commercial, I heard something familiar. It sounded like.... a little piece of heaven. Like a chorus of angels, singing merrily.

It was the Pajama Jeans commercial.

Knowing how amazing I think Pajama Jeans must be, I glanced up at Emily to see if she would have the same reaction I did the first time I saw that very same commercial. When I looked over at her, she was frozen in shock, one hand covering her mouth, while her jaw hung down in disbelief. "She must be shocked by how similar those Pajama Jeans look to real jeans," I thought to myself. They look like they're made by some European designer or something! It doesn't get much better than that, y'all.

A few weeks later, the Super Secret Sunday Society was over, and we were discussing Pajama Jeans again.

(Aside:  Super Secret Sunday Society began when Andy and I started inviting Emily over every Sunday night to eat a (sometimes) homemade dinner and watch The Walking Dead. My best friend came into the mix when we realized that we are quite possibly the most awesome people in the history of ever when we get together. Plus she brings cupcakes. So now every Sunday, we play games or watch tv/movies with dinner, and it's officially my new favorite night of the week.)

It was a Saturday night, and we were all extremely drunk. (Note:  Next time I get extremely drunk, HIDE THE GODDAMN CREDIT CARD.) "Dude, I'm going to order some Pajama Jeans right fucking now, and I'm gonna wear them everywhere, and you're going to be embarrassed to be at the mall with me, but that's okay because I'm comfortable with myself enough to rock the shit out of these Pajama Jeans." After Emily and Katelynn encouraged me (thanks a lot, drunkies), I went on the website only to find out that Pajama Jeans are FIFTY FUCKING DOLLARS A PAIR. Which is when I scoffed and said fuck that shit and decided to try and move on from Pajama Jeans.

But I couldn't get them out of my head, y'all. In the middle of the night, at work, during sex. All I could picture was how much fun Pajama Jeans and me could have been having. Swinging each other through the air in a field of dandelions, sharing a bowl of popcorn at the movies until our fingers accidentally graze each other's and then we giggle and look away shyly, dancing in the middle of the street to no music...

I decided I had to have them. I asked the Twitter community if it was a good idea first and received a resounding YES from one person. That's all the encouragement I needed. I immediately went online to order my first ever pair of PajamaLoveSexJeans.

And this is where the love story starts turning into that upsetting scene in Labrynth, y'know, how the whole movie is pretty much the best movie in the entire Universe, except then David Bowie does that dance sequence with the little creature things, and you're all WHAT. THE. FUCKING. FUCK. I have lost the little respect I had for you, David Bowie, especially if you refuse to take that piratey shirt off for this whole damn movie. Suffice it to say, it turned bad.

The website tricked me into placing two separate orders, one for only one pair of Pajama Jeans and the other for two pairs of Pajama Jeans. Which means I had just spent two hundred dollars on motherfucking Pajama Jeans. Which made me not very happy. And when I'm not very happy, you know what has to happen, right? EVERYONE ON TWITTER MUST KNOW.


And apparently Pajama Jeans are super on top of things because I immediately got a reply back from a PR person for the company. He asked what was going on and requested that I send him an email, explaining my situation. This is an excerpt from the email I sent:

"Hopefully we can get this figured out, because I don't know how much longer I can go on without the styling of jeans and the comfort of pajamas. Just because I'm busy, doesn't mean I can't look sharp, right? And they even look like they were made by some European designer! (Although I'm guessing they were made by some 7 year old South African children in a sweat shop.) And have you seen the women in the commercial? They look ridiculously happy tending to their gardens and drinking coffee in those pajamas jeans. I don't do a lot of gardening or drinking coffee at the local cafe because I have a job and shit to do unlike those women, but I could always just imagine I'm at a ritzy hotel when I'm really sitting in my trailer in my pajama jeans, watching the latest episode of Teen Mom 2. (It's way better than the original Teen Mom.)

Pajama Jeans 4 Lyfe,
Sara"

And my good friend, Ryan: PR Person Extraordinare, wrote me back. Here is an excerpt:

"Not only will we resolve your situation but my hope is that we can improve the system so that more people can have their PajamaJeans so they can await the release of Teen Mom 3 (this will be the original child from the original Teen Mom, making her (insert dramatic music) Teen Grandmom."

Apparently this new phrase is catching on in Ryan's world EVERYWHERE:

You're welcome, Ryan. You're welcome.

Stay tuned for future vlog/blog posts, detailing my love affair with Pajama Jeans. It's going to be the sexiest thing you've ever seen, I'm pretty sure.

Also, much love to Ryan for being the most amazing PR person I've ever dealt with in my entire life. I would offer you sexual favors, but I'm pretty sure that's not allowed. Wink, wink. Nudge, nudge. Meetyououtback.

---------------------------------------------------------------

Thank you to everyone for making this the most fun bloggyversary week ever. (I've only had one, so I'm really just guessing here.) Mardi Gras is for the next two weekends, so I'll take plenty of pictures and make y'all feel like you were here, too. (If I remember.) (AKA I'm gonna be reeeeaaallll drunk, guys.) (For like two weeks straight.) (Because that's what Mardi Gras is all about.)

Love & Orgasms,

Sara

31 comments:

  1. I'm in love with you and I wanna be you.
    Totallynotcreepy.

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  2. It's 11am, I haven't been to sleep yet, I'm dying from this deathly cold/bronchitis onset, and yet this made me laugh to incredibly hard. I am happy. Thank you. :)

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  3. Sooo... basically you've made this man's career. HOORAY NIPPLES. I'd claim royalties or something on that shizz. You have to come to Florida to visit me. :(

    *hugs*

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  4. PAJAMA JEANS MADE ME A BETTER PERSON!

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  5. O, Pajama Jeans rep, I hope you're reading this, because I totes have a huge crush on you now.

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  6. I mother fucking invented pajama jeans. I swear! I was at work in my stupid tight jeans and I told my bff I wished I could wear my jammers to work and then I thought up jammers that look like jeans. Then the fucking very next day, I saw someone write on twitter about pajama jeans. FUCK!!! Damn you!!!

    But I'm totally gonna invent something to make your feet NOT sweat and not get your cute shoes stinky. Not that my feet or shoes stink after a long day of no socks. *cough* I have no idea how I'm gonna do this, but I fucking will. Unless someone reads this and steals my idea. I'm fucked again. Dammit!

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  7. PLEASE make that show/stinkaway thing and send me some.

    ......

    Uh, it's for a friend.

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  8. This is quite possibly the greatest blog post I ever read. If I were licensed to give out blog awards, you would receive one for "Blog Post of the Year" even if it's only fewer than two months into February. Am I allowed to be your biggest fan, or will I have to fight to the death for that title?

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  9. Who would have thunk watching twitter posts could lead to my big break. I got groupies now, thanks Sara.

    WHo knows I might even get a call for a cameo in Teen Mom 4 or at the very least an invite to your weekly shindig.

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  10. Samantha - We can be each other's biggest fans! (There might be sexual favors involved.)

    Ryan - HOLY SHIT, HAPPIEST DAY EVER.

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  11. I love it when people actually respond to you on Twitter. That's very cool. But not cool that you got overcharged. Make sure you take a photo of you ass when you get your PJ jeans!!

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  12. Mmmmkay. Do you have any idea how many people have told me that I should look into getting pajama jeans?! Apparently, my style just screams "This girl needs comfort as well as fashion!" but I have never actually seen the commercials because I too have shit to do (read: naps and drinking wine). So the commercial just pretty much blew my effing mind. Brass rivets?! Pocket design?! I am in. I need pajama jeans to wear everywhere I go. I shall wear them in conjunction with each of my snuggies.

    Also, I'm in on Teen Mom 2, but the original is pretty badass. I could watch Amber kick the nuts off Gary all day long.

    Also, yes, we are in Oklahoma. southside OKC. We have our own super secret club. it's called "meat night and cigarty" because there is meat and cigars.

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  13. I never knew I had lesbian activities in my future when I entered the blog world. Amazing!

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  14. I might have to bookmark this post to read whenever I'm down. That's how much I giggled.

    Also, I wish I had the balls to send e-mails like that to strangers. I'm way too polite.

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  15. Pajama Jeans are a dudes worst nightmare. How many times are you at a guys house and you're like, man I just can't put my pants on because they are so not comfortable. Oh wait, I have Pajama Jeans. PANTS ON. Dude is sad. This is a horrible comment.

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  16. You should have kept the pajama jeans and shared them with us ;D

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  17. I just sleep in my regular jeans.

    They're baggy.

    And I'm lazy.

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  18. That's funny. I wrote a post about pajama jeans a couple of weeks ago. :-D

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  19. Your AWESOME sister-in-law here. First of all, props on describing my first experience with Pajama Jeans! It was truly jaw dropping. I mean theyre pajamas that LOOK like jeans. GENIUS!! Also, I love how you reference David Bowie's "pirate" shirt but not his inappropriate bulge. Those pants where way too tight to be in a childens movie!! PAJAMA JEANS 4 LYFE!!!!!!!!!

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  20. o m g I had never heard of Pajama Jeans until this day, and now I want them like nothing else I have wanted all year. Okay, it's only February, but still. You must update once you receive them and tell us if they are as glorious as they seem.

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  21. So pajama jeans remind me of jeggings, which reminds me of this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gCmwkIFJ_xw

    Also, please do not forget to do wonders for the PR guys at snazzy napper as well.

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  22. Don't be hating on MAGIC DANCE!

    "I saw my baby, crying hard as babies doOOoo. WHAT CAN I DO??!?!!"

    Anyways, the real issue with David Bowie in that movie is the retarded sweatpant spandex that he is wearing that shows his DICKPRINT non stop, all movie long.

    Try as I might, I just can't look away. Eventually it becomes all I see on the scree. Then I have nightmares that Bowie's dickprint is going to come after me (or on me, whichever).

    If only they had pajama jeans back then, Bowie could have worn those instead, and it might have camouflaged the dickprint that the LIGHT FUCKING GRAY leggings he was wearing accentuated so perfectly.

    Oh also, he's a total pedophile in that movie.

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  23. I've been behind in commenting, but congrats on the one year Bloggiversary Sara!!!

    Also, we have something similar to Pajama jeans here... they're made by Reitmans, and they are their version of Jeggings. Not quite as thin as leggings, but with the style and comfort described in pajama jeans. I LOVE them.

    And mine were only 25$ a pair ;)

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  24. You crack my ass up. That is all.

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  25. Can we talk about how much I love this post? I have started saying PajamaJeans4Lyfe in my every day speech. Just saying.

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  26. Sara, I love everything about this post. Just everything.

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  27. This looks AWESOME!! Can't wait to hear what you think of them! I've been hearing of Pajama jeans but it's not real serious stuff here in SOUTH AFRICA. Hahahahaha! =) And I don't do the online-shopping-from-Rand-to-Dollar thing. Did that make sense? Thought not.

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  28. okay, you MUST take lots of pictures/videos with you, in these jeans, when you get them. because i want to know if i need some...
    : ]

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  29. I might start a business called PajamaEveningGown, or possibly PajamaBusinessSuit. My mom likes the idea so I'm pretty sure it's good.

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